Alone is good

“Spend some time alone every day.”

– Dalai Lama –

Sometimes we don’t spend enough time alone. This is normally for a number of reasons, but a big one is because we don’t like our own company and fill the need to fill it with other people.

Understanding that spending time by yourself is important and learning to love my own company, was something that I experienced when I went on my Round the World Trip in 2011.

It was interesting, because I had never taken a big trip just by myself, for any great length of time. Sure I’d go out for a walk or a bike ride by myself. Sure I’d jump on a train or a plane and go and visit friends for a long weekend or a couple of weeks in another country. But I had never travelled just by myself, ever. And boy was it an experience.

The best thing was that I realised that I really am my own best friend, and that everyone else is a bonus. I realised that if I could love my own company and go places and do things that I loved to do, there would always be other people to share those experiences with me, if I wished. But if I was just by myself, that would be just fine too.

This understanding was also anchored when I was reading Eat Pray Love while I was travelling, as Elizabeth Gilbert had the same realisation. She learned to love her own company. Because when you do this, you don’t actually feel alone, because you always have yourself.

I stumbled across these two videos from a stand up show by a British Comedian called Simon Amstell the other day via a daily newsletter that I have just signed up to from a fantastic website called the Elephant Journal. It’s from his show ‘Numb‘ which I actually went to see last year at the Sydney Comedy Festival. It’s interesting to watch both clips, first the one with the laughter and then the one without.

With laughter

Without laughter

And I also came across this beautiful video made by two fantastically creative bunnies. Film maker, Andrea Dorfman and poet/singer/songwriter Tanya Davis. It is a poem, put to music about how wonderful and important it is to spend time alone.

How to be alone – Being along doesn’t have to equal being lonely.