Yesterday ended in a slightly wobbly way for me, and in waking this morning I asked the Universe ‘How I can let go and move forwards positively?’.
The answer came in the form of a beautiful meditation that showed up in my inbox by the very beautiful Luminita (aka The Purpose Fairy). It is one of the most wonderful guided meditations I have listened to in a long time, so I wanted to share it with you all.
If there is anything that happened yesterday that is even slightly unsatisfactory, this is the perfect meditation to help you let go of it, so you can enjoy today in a peaceful, calm and harmonious way.
‘I want to stop being responsible in order to be happy.’
– Abraham Hicks, channelled by Esther Hicks –
When talking with a very good friend of mine yesterday about why some slightly tricky things are happening in my life related to people who I love, she gave me a very interesting piece of advice. That piece of advice was ‘Stop being responsible Kat’.
This was a curious observation and reflection for me and illuminated something that had clearly become a blind spot. And despite the fact that I wrote a blog post to this effect just a couple of days ago, I had obviously understood the concept intellectually, but the Universe was now giving me an opportunity to actually embody this and properly experience the advice I was giving, for myself.
‘In your own time There’s no map to guide our way So I say nothing, you say nothing In your own way Thought I could help you find your place But I’m as lost as you are lost’
– In Your Own Time, Keane –
I’m an eternal optimist. Always have been, always will be. I have always seen the best in people, and always see their highest potential from the get go. I always see their light. The tricky thing is, they don’t always see what I see . . . .
There’s one very special person in my life who I have known from a very young age would be an incredibly successful author. She has always had an incredible gift for writing and a fantastic imagination. I told her a long, long time ago that I saw this future for her, but it was just too overwhelming for her to get her beautiful head around, and she never believed me. So I gave up encouraging her and trusted that if it was meant to be, it would happen.
I’d be lying if I said that I wasn’t frustrated or even a little sad that she wasn’t living up to her potential and using the gifts that she had been given, but this is something I have had to come to terms with in my life.
The good news is, she has started writing, and a book is on its way. It might be ten years after I realised that this was her destiny, but better late than never right?
We can have the best intentions for people in our lives. We can see their gold and the light that is shining right inside of them, but we can’t reach in and turn it up for them. They have to do that for themselves. And we must accept that. We must also accept that we can’t rush them, we can’t push them, we can’t force them, nor can we cajole them. And even more importantly, we must also accept that they may never live up to their potential. Which is probably the hardest one of all for me.
There is another very special person in my life, and I know that they are on this planet to do the most spectacular things. They are wise, creative and gifted beyond comprehension, but they just aren’t ready to embrace their gifts and talents, and perhaps never will. And they may never embrace the spiritual world that is here to help them cultivate their gifts and co-create with them.
I think it is one of the hardest things in life for me to meet people whom I know aren’t living their truth. People who aren’t following their life path or their purpose. People who aren’t using the incredible gifts and talents that they have been given. It makes me sad and frustrated. However, I’m learning more and more every day to let this go, and allow people to find these things out for themselves in their own time, or perhaps not at all.
I also hope and wish that one day I will find a beautiful partner who is aware of what they’re here to do, their gifts and talents and are living on purpose and walking their life path with hope, love, peace and joy. That would make me very happy indeed.
I’m also so incredibly happy and grateful that Numerology came into my life, because it is the most wonderful way to learn all of these things about you. Your Numerology chart is pretty much your cheat sheet for life. A Blueprint for everything that is awesome about you, your gifts, talents, your life path, what makes your heart sing, what your personality is, what your ultimate life purpose is and what themes lie ahead for you.
And for all the people I meet who aren’t living their truth, I take comfort and joy and excitement in the people who come to me for a reading, because these are the people who are ready. These are the people who are ready to do what they came here to do.
My darlings, don’t be afraid to look inside for your light. Don’t be afraid to reach in and turn it up as brightly as you can. Don’t be afraid of how bright your own light can shine, because the brighter you shine, the more you will inspire others to do the same.
Write that book. Start that business. Paint that painting. Make that change. Do what you came here to do. Use the beautiful gifts that you were given.
Sending you love, hugs and light my beautiful friends,
Kat x x x
P.S.
A 60 minute Numerology reading with me costs $250 and you will get your very own Numerology chart as a pdf to keep forever. I hold them in person in Manly or over Skype. Drop me an email at kat@thoughtcloudcollective.com if you’d like one.
. . . It’s not been easy. In fact, it’s been really, really hard for me. I’m sure people on the outside think that I just woke up one day with a cool idea, painted some designs, threw them on a website and then invited people to contribute, but it has taken so much more than that. . . . .
It has taken me, letting go of the image that most people have of me, ‘academic Kat’, ‘intellectual Kat’, ‘clever Kat’, so that I could allow the more ‘creative Kat’ to come in. The way that I am on this planet to truly express myself. Through writing, or singing or painting or designing. It’s been hard, however, my desire to do that which I love and let go of the ‘notself’ has been incredibly liberating, and I feel as though this is just the beginning.
And so, to conclude. Whatever you feel in your heart to do, do it. Whatever you wanted to do when you were little, and never got to do, do it now. There is no time like the present, and anything is possible.
If you always wanted to be a vet, and you’re 40, there’s still time to study and become a vet. If you always wanted to dance, then dance. If you always wanted to write a book, write a book. If you always wanted to start your own business, f*ck it, start your own business goddammit! If you’ve been running a project on the side of your day job and you’d like to start making money out of it, because that is what you would love to do, then do it! You don’t need permission from anyone other than yourself. Life is too short. And just because your choices were taken away from you by someone else earlier in your life, doesn’t mean to say that you can’t make different ones now. You’re too wonderful and too precious and too gifted.
If you feel in your heart to do something, from a place of love, for yourself, for your life, your happiness then do it. I promise you that you won’t regret it. Carpe-the-mother-funking -Diem!
If you would like to have a Numerology reading and learn what your Life Path and Expression numbers are (among many other things), feel free to drop me a line at kat@thoughtcloudcollective.com and I will talk you through your entire Numerological Chart and let you know what the coming year has in store for you. A 60 minute reading with me is $150 AUD.
And if you would like to buy a Katkin t-shirt or tote bag, feel free to skip over to our crowd funding page on Indiegogo.
. . . All of the things that I loved to do as a child, I was bringing back into my life now, and it made me feel happy . . .
One of the things I started to do was paint t-shirt and bag designs, and it was only when I started to share them with people did they start to tell me how much they liked them and that I should do something with them. The problem was I had no confidence in my creativity, and I couldn’t actually believe that anyone would think that something I had painted was any good.
My boyfriend kept asking me when I was going to sell them. Every time I told him, that I wasn’t ready and that I wasn’t really sure whether they were any good. I had been told over and over again, that I wasn’t that creative and that I should study ‘academic’ subjects, so that was all I knew. What gave me the right to start a company designing t-shirts and tote bags?
The thing was, I loved painting and designing them. It got to the point where the designs were flying out of me. I had painted tonnes and tonnes of them and I had come up with hundreds of designs that were just flowing out of me effortlessly and easily. The problem? I didn’t think I was good enough.
My boyfriend (Darren) offered to put money into the business to start it, I refused. My boyfriend continuously asked me, when are you going to do something with Katkin (which was the name I gave to the project)? To which I answered, I don’t know. It got to the point where it had been nearly a year since I had painted my first design and still nothing much had happened.
I just didn’t have the confidence. I just didn’t see myself as someone creative enough to start a clothing company using my own designs.
But Darren never gave up, he kept asking me and asking me. “Come on Kat, when are you going to do this? What needs to happen next?”
Bit, by, bit I inched closer. I took a shortlist of about 8 designs and asked friends to vote via Facebook on their top 4. Then once they were selected, we took some photos of the t-shirts and us in them. Then I plucked up the courage to make a video. And we finally put together a crowd funding campaign to start the business, because the only thing holding us back was capital.
And so, here we are a month or so later and we have raised nearly $2000 so we can get our first run of tees and totes, set up a website and start selling our beautiful designs.
It’s not been easy. In fact, it’s been really, really hard for me. I’m sure people on the outside think that I just woke up one day with a cool idea, painted some designs, threw them on a website and then invited people to contribute, but it has taken so much more than that. . . . .
To find out what else it has taken, tune in tomorrow for the third and last part of this 3 part blog series.
‘Rather than condemning yourself for your mistakes and failures, you can use the experience of suffering to soften your heart.’
– Kristin Neff, Self-Compassion –
Affirmation of the day – I LOVE AND ACCEPT MYSELF EXACTLY AS I AM.
So, the one and only gift that I decided to buy this year was a book, for myself, entitled, Self-Compassion. It was recommended to me, by a very beautiful friend, considering the slightly tricky time that I have been going through recently. So I decided to take his advice.
The opening quote in the book goes like this:
“This kind of compulsive concern with, ‘I, me, and mine’ isn’t the same as loving ourselves. Loving ourselves points us to capacities of resilience, compassion and understanding within that are simply part of being alive.” – Sharon Salzberg, The Force of Kindness
And I have a feeling that the theme of self-compassion is going to be something that will run through my blog posts over the next couple of weeks as I read the book, share my thoughts, feelings and learnings with you and really start to love myself, truly and deeply.
2013 has been an interesting one. I can’t complain, especially considering that at the beginning of the year I set the intention to improve my relationship with money and get a better handle on my finances.
Little did I know that the Universe had a pretty monumental way of teaching me the things that I needed to learn, coming in the form of me not earning anything from my business for the best part of 7 months, and me needing to allow my beautiful boyfriend to financially support me for the duration of that time.
However, I wouldn’t change a thing, as I feel as though I have learnt an incredible amount with regards to money and my relationship with it, and despite the fact that it will take me a little while to pay off my debt and get myself back on to an even keel, I’m much better off than where I started the year.
So, why the importance of self-compassion? I have definitely heard the voices in my head quite recently wanting to beat myself up for the fact that my business was a financial failure for the predominance of the year. And that same voice has been wanting to kick the sh1t out of me for having to be financially supported by my boyfriend, which has also left him in a less than ideal financial position. The voice that wants to blame me, that wishes I’d never had to ask for help. The voice that tells me that I’m weak and unsuccessful. The voice, that in actual fact, not really telling the truth.
Because the truth of the matter is, everything happens for a reason. And also, I asked for this. I wanted to improve my relationship with money, therefore I needed to be open to whichever way the lessons I needed to learn would show up. This is how the Universe works.
If I’m wanting to live a life of true abundance, I’m not going to be able to manifest things, money, people, businesses, customers, clients, opportunities etc. if I’m not open to receiving them, or if I don’t know what to do with them, once I have them.
So, now is not the time to beat myself up internally or berate myself. Now is the time to be kind and compassionate to myself. To be unconditionally loving and allow whatever feelings and emotions to come up that need to surface. To feel any pain, disappointment or sadness that I need to feel. But then not to be mean to myself because I’m feeling these things. Instead choose to comfort myself, just as I would a friend who would be going through the same thing. In short, to be the best friend that I could possibly be to myself.
In her book Self Compassion, Kristin Neff starts the book by clearly stating how we can be more compassionate to ourselves,
‘To stop judging and evaluating ourselves altogether. To stop trying to label ourselves as ‘good’ or ‘bad’ and simply accept ourselves with an open heart. To treat ourselves with the same kindness, caring and compassion we would show a good friend, or even a stranger for that matter. Sadly, however, there’s almost no one whom we treat as badly as ourselves.’
And it is my mission and promise to myself to treat myself with the same level of love, kindness and compassion that I show to all of the beautiful people in my life. And I have a feeling that this will become the theme for 2014 for me. SELF COMPASSION and time to really start loving myself, truly, madly and deeply.
If you’d like to start this too, I can highly recommend writing a love letter to yourself. I did this yesterday, and it was definitely a very lovely experience. I also came across this beautiful video on finerminds.com this morning and it really inspired me and compliments the sentiment of my post today perfectly.
It’s rare that we sit down and write a letter to ourselves outlining all of the things that we love about ourselves, but I feel as though now is as good a time as any. There isn’t really anything to lose.
I’m really looking forward to seeing through the last remaining days of 2013, savouring every last one and preparing myself for an even bigger and better 2014. One filled with unconditional love for myself and others, and a life of effortless flow filled with abundance in all areas, business, relationships, love, health, finances, emotions and spirituality.
“Where there is great love, there are always great miracles.”
– Willa Cather –
I’m going to keep this short and sweet today, as it is Christmas.
I wanted to share a heartwarming video in this blog post, and managed to stumble across something that is perfect from our trusted friend, You Tube.
Despite the fact that it is video promoting American airline, Westjet, it is also a beautiful example of the kinds of miracles that are possible when we think a little differently, attempt to do something slightly out of the ordinary and unexpected, and when people all pull together to do something nice for others. It’s had nearly 33 million hits, so a few people must have liked it. 🙂
I hope you all have had, are having or will have a very Happy Christmas Day filled with peace, joy and love.
And may everything that you wish for come true in 2014.
Sending you love and light,
Kat x x x
P.S.
If you would like to help Darren and I create a miracle in 2014 and raise $10k to start our new conscious clothing company, Katkin, skip over to our crowd funding page to learn more and buy an awesome hand painted bamboo t-shirt or an organic tote bag.
‘Keep giving me hope for a better day Keep giving me love to find a way Through this heaviness I feel I just need someone to say, everything’s okay’
– Lenka –
After Parts 1 and 2 to this series, welcome to Part 3.
. . . . So, even though I was always earning, generally, whatever I earned, I spent. So I had a break even approach. And this approach fell down for me this year, because I didn’t earn, and therefore I had nothing to spend. A perfect way (although it didn’t seem so at the time) to learn that I needed to find a better way of managing money.
And during these last 7 months I read a fantastic book that has changed my life. Secrets of the Millionnaire Mind – Think Rich to Get Rich by T.Harv Eker is a book about money with a whole bunch of awesome spiritual messages and philosophies trojan horsed into it. And despite its title, it’s a book as much about how to get your mindset in the right place in order to become a millionnaire, as it is about changing what he refers to as you ‘Money Blueprint’, which he believes we are all born with. He helps you to become aware of limiting beliefs that you might have around money and he gives you specific and practical exercises that you can do to start to shift and change them.
However, the MOST helpful piece of advice that he gave in the book that has helped to completely and utterly change my relationship with money is this.
For every amount of money that comes into your bank account, whether it is $10, $100, $1000, $10,000, $100,000 or $1,000,000, split that amount in 6 different ways.
50% goes into a necessities pot – this is for all the essential things in your life like rent, bills, food etc.
10% goes into a fun pot – this is for doing (funnily enough) fun things in life, anything from going to a gig, out to dinner with a friend or rock climbing
10% goes into an education pot – this is for furthering your personal education and development. It could contribute to training courses you’d like to do or books you’d like to read.
10% goes into a long term savings pot – this is pretty straightforward.
10% goes into a financial freedom pot – this pot is for investing. Ultimately, the investments that you make with this money will mean that your money is working for you, rather than you working for your money. Some good sound investments here could significantly change things in your life for the better.
10% goes into a giving pot – the idea of tithing has been around for a long time, and put simply, it is the act of giving 10% of what you earn to a good cause.
I started doing this in July when I read the book. You can do it with as little as $10, but it has completely and utterly changed how I am interacting with and dealing with money. I even went to the extent of setting up separate savings accounts with my bank, so that I could separate my money into each of the pots.
To read the last instalment of this 4 part blog post series, tune in tomorrow.
Here’s a beautiful song called ‘Everything’s OK‘ to make you feel good today by the lovely Lenka.
‘Nothing ever goes away until it teaches us what we need to know.’
– Anon –
Following on from Part 1 of this four part blog series, here is Part 2 for you.
. . . I literally had no money in my account for months and months and months. Any money that Darren helped me out with went straight out to pay for training courses I had already committed to, paid for my phone bill, or contributed to ferry tickets so I could go into the city and meet with prospective clients.
This was the most dire financial situation I had been in throughout my entire life. However, I know, for certain that it happened for a reason. In fact, it had to happen. Because I needed to learn the things that I needed to learn, by going through what I went through. And no matter how rubbish it felt throughout that 7 month period, I have come out of it the other side, an even better person than I was before. I also know that I wouldn’t have the perspective I have now looking back on it.
So, you may ask, what have I learnt? And this for me is the most important thing. Life sometimes throws us curveballs. Sometimes it gives us something to deal with that, in the moment, we feel as though we just aren’t equipped to handle. But, sometimes what we don’t realise is, that the Universe only ever gives us exactly what we need, in the exact moment that we need it. And it never gives us anything greater than that which we are equipped to deal with.
So, what have I learnt?
I’ve learnt to receive help from people who love me, much more easily and willingly – I know that before this year I would feel very guilty receiving help from people. I didn’t want to feel vulnerable or weak. I didn’t want to be a burden. I didn’t want to put people out. I didn’t want to admit that I needed help from someone. It was always much easier to just deal with things by myself. And so far this year, I have definitely allowed people to help me a lot more than I ever had.
It has been in these moments of allowing myself to be vulnerable, that I have allowed someone in, who loves me, to help me. And by doing so, I have softened my heart and started to remove some of the armour I had subconsciously built up around it. The armour that existed, because I didn’t want people to think that I was weak.
I’ve also learnt to have a better relationship with money – my relationship with money had never been perfect. Before I started my business, throughout my 20s, I had earned a lot of money working in the Corporate World in Branding and Marketing. In fact, since starting working for Virgin in 2003, I can’t really remember there ever being a time where I struggled for cash. I was always earning. There was always money in my bank account. I never had to worry about whether I could afford to do something or go somewhere, I just did. I had a Carpe Diem approach to life and a Carpe Diem approach to money. However, I never saved. I never had anything in reserve. It was only when I was with my ex-boyfriend that I saved, and that was only for one year. It was an important year though, because the $7000 that I saved while we were together, contributed to the other money that I saved not long after my 30th birthday, which paid for my Round the World Trip, which ended up bringing me to Australia . . . . .
Recently I have really got into the crowdfunding movement. I think it is one of the most beautiful ways to get funding from likeminded people for a project, book, film, album or business you are wanting to start, but lack the capital to get it going.
I’m working on a film called A Vibrational World at the moment and we will be running a crowdfunding campaign for the first round of funding quite soon. And I am also pulling together a campaign to fund a conscious clothing company that I am wanting to start called Katkin. More on those two projects in later posts though.
Anyway, I have set the intention to start to find and fund projects through Indiegogo that I think rock, and yesterday was no exception.
I came across the most beautiful musical artist from Seattle, called Parzival yesterday who was looking for $1000 funding to support the release of his new album called ‘Pisces Rising’. The album ‘tells the story of love and self-acceptance as a way through modern perils.’ Which I thought was super cool, especially considering the work that I have been doing on myself in this space over the last few years.
So I followed the link to the campaign page and came across this incredibly beautiful song, which reduced me to tears pretty quickly. ‘Til I Knew You, is not only a song about love for another, but most definitely a song about the love that we need to have for ourselves. And the fact that we can only experience that love, when we decide to truly open our heart and allow ourselves to be vulnerable.
I donated $25 US in exchange for a digital download of his new album, a CD copy of it and a copy of his first CD too. The digital download was emailed to me a few hours after I had donated, which was super cool.
Firstly I would say, if you like the song, pop along to his Indiegogo page and contribute to his campaign. And secondly I would say, if you have any kind of project or business idea that you have had in the back of your mind or floating around for some time, but have been held back by lack of funds, now you have no excuse. Just set up a crowdfunding campaign, share it with friends and family and see what happens. You might be pleasantly surprised.
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